Stay away from Facebook right now, Brexiteers - it will just annoy the hell out of you!

I'll admit to not being a great Facebook user. I joined up when it first became a thing. I posted stuff on it, but when I contemplated using it to link to articles on this blog, I suddenly realised how unsuitable it would prove. Most of my friends aren't on it (at least, the ones I've looked for) and the people I'm "friends" with (one or two old pals, a few acquaintances, some former work colleagues who I really liked, and some relatives and in-laws) are, on the whole, mildly left-wing, as far as I can tell. I couldn't really see the point of causing an upset by exposing them to opinions that would only annoy them: by the same token, while I'm interested to find out what they're up to, I don't really want to be subjected to their political views (I had quite enough of that during 20 years at the BBC).

I tend to catch up with Facebook every ten days or so. I look forward to hearing about births, death, marriages, anniversaries, job changes, and seeing holiday snaps, photos of exotic meals at expensive restaurants, idyllic country scenes, garden redesigns, kitchen extensions, and music and cute puppy videos etc. Whenever a "friend" has insisted on regularly posting political opinions or links to annoying pundits (e.g. the one who kept linking to articles by - of all people - Paul Krugman, or the chap whose friend request I accepted only to be instantly bombarded by a mass of pro-BBC propaganda interspersed with attacks on UKIP racists, or the expert software coder who turned out to be a fanatical atheist) I defriend them: I'd prefer to remember them with fondness - and vice-versa, I'm sure.

This all tootled along sedately and pleasantly until, during the run-up to the EU referendum, my timeline was suddenly polluted by occasional pro-Remain items from two or three "friends". I decided to ignore them, because they'd surely stop after some post-win crowing. But their side lost, and when, a few days after the result had been announced (looking for some temporary relief from news of political turmoil) I look at Facebook, I found - to my astonishment - an overwhelming deluge of rage and despair. Leavers had (1) destroyed the economy (2) split the United Kingdom asunder (3) ruined young people's chance of a happy, prosperous life (4) unleashed a tsunami of racist hatred across the realm (5) shown contempt for our noble and selfless European allies, and (6) made every informed, intelligent person in the country cry their eyes out.

I discovered that the reason Leavers had voted the wrong way was because they were stupid, blinkered, frightened, read The Sun, were working class, lived outside London, had white skins, were old, had never been to university and - my dear! - simply never travelled in Europe. Of course, the vote had to be overturned at once, because.... because there was this petition and lawyers were saying it might be illegal to leave the EU and Europe was relying on us to save them and even (bizarrely) because it was Britain's destiny to lead Europe (I think Germany might have something to say about that) and wouldn't it be great if MPs simply refused to do what they had after only been advised to do by the public and anyway all the Leavers had already changed their minds and now wanted to stay and...and...

For God's sake - you're British! Get a fucking grip!

My wife, who uses Facebook regularly, has oodles of "friends", and thoroughly enjoys it, was so distressed and angered by the barrage of hysterical bullshit on her timeline she even posted a comment asking one of her younger relatives why her (my wife's) vote should be discounted. A reply followed - 17 million people could go to hell because, you see, Leavers didn't realise what harm they'd done, and they'd been lied to, and they simply didn't understand that young people no longer saw the Channel as a barrier to Europe (mind you, that non-existent barrier came in quite handy in the early 1940s, so I've heard). Now, I'm not quite sure why a childless person in early middle-age would be better-placed to interpret the world-view of young people than the mother of a 22-year old son, but we'll let that pass. We're not talking about rational responses here.

I wasn't going to bring this subject up at all, as I've argued before that anyone who wants to share their political opinions with the world would be far better off setting up their own blog or signing up to Twitter, where political obsessives like me hang out. But I took a look at Facebook about an hour ago for the first time in five or six days - and they're still at it! If anything, it's got worse. I think I'll give it another month before dipping my toe back in the water: maybe by that time the Remainers will have realised that their fellow-Britons voted to leave the EU because they don't like being bossed about by arrogant foreigners and their lickspittle fifth columnists inside this country. Britain has regularly gone to war at the very prospect of French or German rule: with any luck it won't require a war - civil or otherwise - to call a halt to it this time.